Banter

The biggest benefit of learning Japanese hasn't been gaining the ability to read street signs, talk to my co-workers, or re-order things on the phone.

It's been being able to understand the things my students say.

Here are some short examples of some of my favorite conversations.

Context: Doing an activity where they had to list things starting with a certain letter. For example, an item you put in the fridge that starts with K.

Student A, very proud of himself: "KITCHEN CLEANER!"

Student B: "Ah, yeah!"

Student B, immediately after: "Wait, what kind of weirdo puts kitchen cleaner in the fridge?"

Student A: "Oh, good point."

Context: Doing an interview activity.

Student A (in English): When is your brother's birthday?

*From here it was in Japanese*

Student B: "Uh... I don't know."

Student A: "You don't know your brother's birthday!? What kind of brother are you?"

Student B: "I really don't know, though."

Student B, suddenly in English: "I don't like my brother, so I don't know."

Student B, again in English: "Wait, my brother is dead!"

Student A, in English: "He's dead? He's DEAD!? OH MY GOD!!"

Student B, in Japanese again: "Ah, what a sad story! I can't believe my brother is dead!"

His brother was not, in fact, dead.

Context: Two friends goofing off when they were supposed to do an activity.

Student A: "I can't talk to girls."

Student B: "They wouldn't notice you anyway."

Student A: "Whoa. That was harsh. You - you're like the grim reaper. Your heart is totally black."

Context: Trying to think of ice cream flavors that start with B.

Student A: "John, is banana ok?"

Me: "I've... never seen banana flavored ice cream before. Have you?"

Student A: "No."

Student B: "Me neither."

Me: "Do you think it might exist, though?"

Student A: "I don't know."

Student B: "Probably."

Me: "Yeah, probably somewhere."

Student A: "Banana it is!"

Student B: "I absolutely need to find banana ice cream now."

Context: Students commenting on my haircut, which was basically a buzz cut at the time.

Student A, in English: "You cutting hair."

Me: "Yes, I got a hair cut."

Student A: "It looks good."

Student B: "You look like Frieza from Dragon Ball."

Thanks.

Context: Me arranging the little chicken plush things the ALT before me made before class started.

Student A: "I love those."

Me: "Me too. I think the ALT before me made them."

Student A: "Oh yeah, I knew him."

Student B: "It's like a little chicken army."

Student A, picking one up: "This is my brother."

Me: "Your brother?"

Student A: "Yes. He's my precious little brother. I won't ever let anything happen to him."

Ok then.

It's those little conversations that really add spice to your day.

As an aside, I walked into the English room the other day to find those same little chicken things arranged in front of the tape recorder, as if performing some sort of ritual.

Despite breaking the language barrier, I don't always understand my students... but I sure do love them.